Well this might be a first….two updates within a week’s span.  The best part is we have been on a tear creating new beer centric dishes and the better part more beer is being consumed.  Heck we have even took the insane step and converted an old freezer into a four tap (possibly six) keg beer dispensing machine.  Granted they are homebrew kegs so only five gallons a piece but hey got to start somewhere.

Besides the beer dispenser of joy the garden is starting to kick ass and take names.  There are now eight eight by four beds soon to be filled with way to many tomatoes and peppers that we are going to have to force them down friend’s throats.  Oh hell like they would mind because they love being present for the insanity of our experiments.

Speaking of experiments this was one of those.  We ended up with a couple bottles of smoked porter and after consuming one of them we figured why the hell not make some stroganoff.  We have been doing good at watching what we consume and large quantities of sour cream are definitely in order.

This is a pretty simple and easy dish that was awesome.  If you lack smoked porter fear not because any porter or a milder stout (save the Bell’s Hell Hath No Fury for drinking not cooking).

For this recipe you will need:

1. Couple pound of chuck roast cut into 1 inch wide strips
2. 1 onion sliced
3. 4 cloves of garlic diced
4. 8 ounces of mushrooms sliced
5. 12 ounces of beer (duh)
6. 1 teaspoon paprika
7. pinch of crushed red pepper
8. 1 cup of beef stock
9. Bay leaf
10. 4 sprigs of thyme
11. 1 teaspoon Dijon
12. 1 cup sour cream
13. Flour
14. Tablespoons of butter
15. Salt and pepper
16. Good handful a person of egg noodles

Steps to success:

1. Flour the chuck roast
2. In a dutch oven or large stockpot add in a couple tablespoons of butter.
3. Once the butter has melted start browning the beef in stages.
4. Remove and set aside as it is done and you will probably have to add in more butter which there is no harm in doing.
5. Once the beef is browned add in the onion and cook until softened and starting to brown up (about 5 minutes).  Add in the garlic and cook for 30 seconds or fragrant.
6. Add in the beer, beef stock, bay, Dijon, paprika, crushed red pepper, and a pinch of salt and pepper.
7. Add the beef back in, bring to a boil, reduce to a simmer, cover and let it go for an hour and a half.
8. Taste the dish and if you are happy add in the mushrooms.
9. Cook for another 20-30 minutes covered or until the beef is tender and mushroom tasty.
10. Now is a good time to get those egg noodles cooking
11. Kill the heat and stir in the cup of sour cream
12. Serve and enjoy over egg noodles.

Just to get everyone off my butt right now…this is not chili and this is not mac and cheese.  This is the combination of both worlds in one awesome calorie laden dish.  Besides that is also cheap to make which is even better given I blew all my money on an awesome Valentine’s Day present for Heather….

Anyways as usual you can always tell when Jeff is writing because I have zero to say.  In fact I am going to pay her to ghost write for me…….

You will need:

• 1 lb ground beef (I used venison that was floating around from my buddy getting a deer last year)
• 1 onion finely diced
• 1 bell pepper finely diced
• 4-5 cloves of garlic
• 3-4 tablespoons whole chili powder (ancho and guajillo were used)
• 1 tablespoon cumin
• 1 teaspoon oregano
• 1/2-1 teaspoon cayenne
• 1 bottle of beer (we used Brooklyn Brown Ale)
• 2 cups of beef stock
• 1 jar of green chilis
• 1/2 to 3/4  box of elbow macaroni (how much you like is how much you throw in).
• 2 cups of cheese (one cup habanero cheddar and another cup of straight cheddar)
• 1 can of kidney beans drained
• 2 large can of tomatoes not drained
• bacon grease or canola oil

Steps to success:

• Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
• Saute the onions and bell pepper until softened (about 5 minutes) in bacon grease in your favorite cast iron dutch oven (large stockpot works too).
• Add in the meat and cook until no longer pink.
• Add in the garlic, chili powder, cumin, and orgeno and cook for another minute.
• Add in the rest of the ingredients except for the cheese. Cook uncovered until the macacroni is done and the liquid has evaporated (about 12 minutes)
• Throw in a cup of cheese and mix in
• Throw the rest of the cheese on top and shove in the oven uncovered for 10-15 minutes (until the cheese has melted and hardened up)

Serve and enjoy!

Hello fellow visitor this is a blast from the past blogger signing in. Yes I know we stopped and you probably missed the awesomeness we posted but well being totally honest we got lazy. Ok lazy is probably the wrong word because we have been busy just not blogging busy.

So I am not going to waste your time rambling about nothing so cutting to the chase and getting to the recipe.

• 3 lb chuck roast
• 2 onions
• 5-6 cloves of garlic
• 2 tablespoons of tomato paste
• Bottle of good beer. We used a black lager.
• 4 cups of beef stock
• Tablespoon of fresh thyme
• Tablespoon of fresh rosemary
• teaspoon of cayenne (if you are a sissy use less)
• 3-4 bay leaves
• Couple carrots
• Couple really good handfuls of red and yellow potatoes quartered
• 8 ounce package of mushrooms quartered
• Cup of frozen peas
• Bacon

Fire up your dutch oven and throw in the bacon. Remove and set aside once cooked.

Salt and pepper the daylights out of the chuck roast and throw it in the bacon grease to get browned.

While you wait eat the bacon.

Remove the chuck roast and set aside. Add in the onions and cooked until brown over (about 5 minutes)

Add in the garlic and tomato paste and cook for another minute.

Add in the beer, beef stock, bay leaves, cayenne, thyme, and rosemary. Throw the pot roast back in, bring to a boil, reduce, and let it simmer for a couple hours covered.

After two hours, taste, and adjust (let me guess you need more salt and since you were a sissy and choked back on the cayenne you realized it needs more heat). Now chop up all the veggies and throw them in a cast iron skillet with some more bacon grease (cook more bacon if you have to) and let them get brown over.

Dump them into with the pot roast and let this cook for another 20 minutes.

Remove the chuck roast and shred it. Dump in the peas. If it is to really liquidy then mix in a couple tablespoons of flour with water and dump in to thicken it up.

Serve and enjoy.

So where oh where did we go?  Let us just call it a place called burnoutville.  Between holidays, other obligations, beer, more obligations, general disdain for discussions about SEO over why we got into blogging which is FOOD!!!!!!  Not saying I would not like to make it rich and relax on a private island for the rest of my life but we just care more about the food we cook than if golly gee someone from Food Network sees this and wants to offer us a million dollar contact to get in front of a camera and act like idiots to show users how to properly chop an onion (I can already see people hitting the unsubscribe from blog button).

Also, I would like to point out that this recipe does not contain beer.  This is shocking because our last runs contained nothing but beer.  Fear not you hobos slamming your 40s discretely wrapped in paper bags we will be providing more beer soaked food in the coming weeks. 

Well work summons so off to do what allows us to afford web space so we can ramble about nothing and everything all at the same time.  Yeah we are that good…

For this recipe you first need to make the meatballs.  If you do not have a super secret family recipe here is a pretty idiot proof one:

1. 2 # Ground Beef
2. 1 # Ground Pork
3. 1 c breadcrumbs
4. 3 T minced parsley
5. 2 T minced garlic
6. 1/2 onion, minced
7. 2 eggs
8. Blue cheese

To make the meatballs:

1. Combine all ingredients except blue cheese.
2. Form into balls and shove a piece of blue in the middle because let us face it everything is better with more cheese.
3. Put in fridge for a couple of hours to harden up.

For the rest of the recipe you will need:

1. 2 cups of Frank’s hot sauce (used the extra hot)
2. 1 onion diced
3. Couple stalks of celery diced
4. Carrot diced

Steps for glory:

1. 8 TB of butter
2. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
3. Melt the butter over medium heat. Add in the meatballs in batches and brown all over. Remove and set aside.
4. Add in the celery, carrot, and onion and sauté until softened.
5. Add the meatballs back in and pour the hot sauce over top of them
6. Put in the oven for 20 minutes or until they are done. Serve with more blue cheese

Serve and enjoy!

So. We meet again.

Funny. You sure have been hanging around more often lately. I think it is because you LOVE us and you LOVE our food and you LOOOVVVEEEE our salty wit. Jeff thinks you keep coming back because we are certifiably insane and like a good train wreck, you just can’t look away.

Okay, he may be SOMEWHAT correct. But regardless you like us enough to stick around, even if it is to see what the hell happens next. Well look out because somehow we are returning for yet another round of THE GREATEST BLOG ON EARTH! Staring yours truly(s), and about 59 other insanely hungry bloggers. And this time, our lovely host FoodBuzz, is pulling us kicking and screaming from the sanctity of our kitchens and thrusting us out into the cold cruel world to eat SOMEWHERE ELSE. Controlling as they are, we not only had to make and eat ONE course, but THREE. And they were going to make us bring something to drink too. And pack it all in a rather small yet well insulated FoodBuzz Cooler. The horror!

Ok look. We were getting a little tanked here. All we have been doing for the past 5 weeks is cooking up elaborate meals for our friends and family. And before that was summer time. Where we, well, grilled up elaborate meals for our friends and family. Don’t get me wrong. WE LOVE YOU GUYS! But seriously, I am beginning to think we are not a “couple” but a thirteen-sum. We were dying for some quiet time alone to, uhh, sit and get to know one another(?) So Jeff suggested a little day trip. We would bring along our stocked cooler of provisions. Enjoy a simple overnight camping trip at week’s end. He would even take a HALF DAY! Just him and me. Us. And a tent. Meh. Usually I am opposed to tent slumber because of the lack of outlets, but I was THRILLED at the chance for a break from the day-to-day and I JUMPED on him it.

Look! Look how happy I am in this photo. I am squeezing the LIFE out of our sleeping bag!

That big smile. The look of sheer joy. THAT WAS PURE BLISS I TELL YOU!

—

“Was” being the KEY word in that sentence… because here I am Wednesday.

As Jeff had just informed me that we had the obligations of a family function to attend. BUT not all hope was lost he told me after enduring me whining for thirty five minutes. We could just go SATURDAY after we got home!

See? Me. Happ happ happy! (WHY YES! Yes you crazy detective you – that IS the same happy photo. Congratulations. You get a cookie…)

Then Friday morning rolled around. And I was all making the bed and making coffee and making plans and then I look at Jeff. Jeff who had this look on his face that includes his “I’m cute please don’t kill me” smile. I glared at him. He said “um hon I forgot that I was on call this week and there is this thing I need to do this weekend (translation SATURDAY NIGHT) because of the fact I am on call but I can probably do it tonight but I’ll have to stay late and…” My eyes must have done a slow burn into his brain as he back peddled out of the room. I yelled after him JUST MAKE IT HAPPEN as he grabbed his coffee and slid out the door professing his ever undying love because lets face it, he had to come home to me.

But HE ACTUALLY PULLED IT OFF! He did what he had to do and we fulfilled our family obligations and YAY we were finally on our way! AND THEN his PHONE rang. My blood ran cold. He answered. Swallowed hard and his eyes became saucers as he turned to me. I mouthed “I kill you” as he pulled into the center lane. And turned around. No WiFi in the woods he said. I have responsibilities he said. You DO understand that right he said? I nodded that I did, showed him that he was my number one and sulked the entire way home. Sigh.

But you know what. He STILL made it happen. We just didn’t go that far from home. And my tent wasn’t a tent but it had outlets. And WiFi. And a view of our house. We “camped” in our back yard. And where I know that we didn’t technically leave home, we DID leave the house. And cooked up a storm with our cooler full of camping goodies at “Camp He Cooks She Cooks.”

First on the menu was Camp Fire Chili. Lucky us we installed that fire pit or we would have had to set fire to the remains of the tomato garden.

We (Jeff) makes one mean pot of chili. (My chili has beans in it which almost got me kicked out of his circle of trust but since it is just me and him in it he had to make a few concessions.) And chili over an open fire while pseudo-camping would be even better.

Camp Fire Mole Chili with Bells Two Hearted Ale

3 lbs of chuck, cubed and dusted with flour
1/2 lb bacon, diced
1 T paprika
4-6 T whole chili powder (started with 4 TB but added more halfway through to taste)
1 T oregano
1 T mix of cumin and coriander (1 to 1/2 ratio)
2 ounces of Mexican unsweetened chocolate
1 bottle of a high quality ale
3 cups of beef stock
1 onion, diced
4 cloves of garlic, minced
1/4 teaspoon of cayenne powder
1 large can of diced tomatoes
salt/pepper

First things first. You need to cook up the magical chili mirepoix.

Cook up the bacon while the dutch oven is getting hot, rendering out all that awesome bacon grease.

Remove the bacon, and brown the beef in the bacon grease. You will probably have to do this in a couple of batches so that you do not over crowd the beef or it will not brown.

Remove the beef and allow to drain.

Cook up the onions for a couple of minutes, till just softened.

It is customary at this point to crack open a beer. If you do not, your chili will fail miserably. Just saying.

Now add the beef and bacon back to the pot along with everything else on the list.

Mix well, cover and relax. Check and stir every 20-30 minutes, tasting each time. We always end up adding more chili powder and sometimes salt as we cook. This is why tasting is important. Cleanse you palate each time with another tasty brew.

And while that chili cooked for a couple of hours, Jeff plugged away on his computer, every so often checking my level of annoy-ity. It was waning. But I wasn’t going to admit that to him. Besides I had a book, my Droid and corn bread pancake-like fritters to attend to.

Sweet Corn Camp Side Cakes

Part 1 – the dry ingredients:
1 cup AP flour
1 cup corn meal
1/4 cup sugar
1 T baking powder

Part 2 – the wet ingredients:
1 egg
1/4 cup milk
2 T canola oil

Part 3 – the grill side ingredients:
hand full of the bacon reserved from the chili
1/2 cup corn kernels

Add all ingredients together, stir to incorporate.

While Jeff saved the world – I tried not to burn myself cooking over hot coals.

Heat oil (we used extra bacon grease brought from home) in a cast iron skillet. Once the oil is hot, drop spoon fulls of the batter in the skillet. Cover and cook a few minutes. They will get nice and puffy. Flip and cook till golden. NOTE: Over hot coals this all happens pretty fast. Stove top you can control the heat. By the way, these would work great in a cast iron corn bread pan.

Yay! Time to eat. The chili was hot and spicy and the corn bread sweet. Feel free to top your chili with whatever your little ole’ heart desires… We used onion, Serrano and queso fresco cheese. It was the perfect meal while kinda camping the backyard on a dreary, overcast 60° day. So perfect Jeff stopped working to eat. Double yay!

And while we enjoyed dinner. I tossed the apples in the coals.

Hot Coal Apples

apples
brown sugar
cinnamon
whole oat granola

Core and slice the apples.

Place the apple in the center of a sheet of foil.

Throw some brown sugar, granola and cinnamon on the apple.

Wrap up in a ball.

Toss on hot but not flaming coals (or in a 375° oven). Leave for 5-10 minutes.

Flip and leave for a few minutes more.

Serve with a splash of cream.

So obstructions, set-backs, delays and changes in scenery aside, it was an absolutely great time. We did admit however, it felt realllllly weird to not have a yard full of friends eating and drinking and laughing with us. But yea we still didn’t pick up the phone to call any of you. Actually we did text one friend to rub in the roaring fire, the yummy chili and the cold beer but he deserved it. We’ll make it all up to you this weekend. Promise.

Sorry we didn’t invite you either, dear reader, but we hope that you will forgive us and cast a vote in our favor for Most Awesomeist Food Bloggers Evaaah! If you do there is an ice cold beer in it for you.

You can find it in the cooler at the liquor store on the corner of… Oh who am I kidding. You KNOW where it is.