A Crumpet for you. A Crumpet for me.

There is this old saying. “Eat breakfast like a king. Lunch like a prince. Dinner like a pauper.” Do this and you will take in most of your fat and calories when you need it most – like I don’t know… for ENERGY, and the least right before you hit the sack. This is easier said then done with Jeff. For instance tonight we are making beef stew which could feed the whole block. Not that I mind. It is freaking YUM and I will have dinner for a couple of days, Jeff will have dinner and lunch for a couple of days, and I might even have enough left over to bribe the maintenance guy at my apartment building to bump up the amount of hot water my shower provides. A trickle does not a shower make my friend.

Anyway, I have a tendency to eat breakfast, lunch AND dinner like I am Good King (Queen?) Wenceslas. (See how I threw in that itty bitty touch of Christmas? And yes, Jeff is crossing his eyes at this very moment in his Scrooge McDuck PJ’s.) And I know for a fact that most of you do just the opposite of what you are supposed to do. Yes. I am talking to YOU!… Breakfast like a pauper. A pauper who can afford Starbucks and a scone, sure, but a pauper none the less. BAD! You just fasted all night and now you have to be alert. Okay, I will admit. Caffeine is a good start.  But you need more. So. If we should eat breakfast like a king, how about we throw in a little of what British Royalty refer to as the dogs bollocks. Although I PROMISE they do not taste like bollocks nor were any dogs harmed in the making of these most pukka crumpets.

Now crumpets are generally bland and eaten with jam or butter. I however also love them to sop up messy egg yolks and bacon grease. I know – WHO KNEW? Also, I make mine with buttermilk rather then plain milk. I always have buttermilk on hand (because why you ask? I make my own butter…) Plus I find that that buttermilk tang really makes them tasty. You do need a few kitchen tools tho. Like a nice griddle, and crumpet rings. You can also use egg / pancake rings. I actually use biscuit cutters. The handle makes them easier to pull off the crumpet without burning my fingers and in truth it is all I have in my 4 foot kitchen at the moment. I is so smart.

crumpets

What you need:
1 2/3 C AP flour
1 2/3 C bread flour
3/4 t cream of tartar
2 1/4 t yeast
1 T sugar
2 1/4 C warm water
3 t salt
1 t baking soda
2/3 c room temp buttermilk

What you need TO DO:

Sift together flours and cream of tartar. Set aside.

Combine yeast, sugar and water. Let sit till frothy – about 10 minutes.

Add flour mixture to yeast mixture and beat till smooth. Let stand 1 hour. During this time the batter should rise and fall.

After an hour, add the salt, blend well, and let sit for 30 minutes.

Damn. There sure is a lot of WAITING for these freaking things…

Combine the buttermilk and the baking soda, then add to the batter gently. It may seem like the batter is “fighting” the addition of the buttermilk. That is because this isn’t really a batter, and it isn’t really dough. It is soon to be a crumpet. They like to rock it their own way. Just mix gently and soon it will play along.

When you have a nice smooth batter going, let it sit while you heat your griddle over low heat and grease your crumpet rings.

Place the rings on the griddle and pour the batter (I use a ladle) into the rings, filling them half way. Cook over low heat for 7-8 minutes. Bubbles should form and pop leaving those yummy little craters on the top of the crumpet. Once the crumpet is cooked thru, i.e. a little dry on the surface (it will also pull slightly away from the ring…) remove ring and flip. Cook till golden – about 2-3 minutes. We Interrupt this Recipe for a Message of MUY IMPORTANCE! The rings MUST be greased very well. And you need to be PATIENT waiting for the crumpet to cook before flipping. Ignoring either of these two directives will only result in tears and crumpet fail.

So once the crumpets have cooked 2 – 3 minutes on the other side, remove from heat and cool on a wire rack.

Toast when ready and serve with butter or bacon or jam or bacon or eggs or bacon. Did I mention they are AMAZING with bacon? Too bad you only get a photo with butter. My bacon motivation this weekend only went as far as eating it. (But I just said it 5 times to one up Jeff in the smoked pork quota…) By the way. You can bake. And freeze. And when you want one or twelve, just take em out and throw em in the toaster.

And woot your a king! Just don’t let all that royalty go to your head Kamehameha…

Cooked up by Heather

26 Comments

  1. 24
    January 8

    I wish I could eat breakfast in your house, those crumpets looks delicious! What is ac flour?

    • 24.1
      January 8

      Do you mean AP? Sorry, that means All Purpose.

  2. 23
    December 19

    OOH!! I came over here to check out the crumpets!! I can’t wait to try these. I’ve had them in the store and they resemble a soggy rubber bread. I know these will be so much better.

  3. 22
    December 18

    Woot woot…blowing trumpet for these lovely crumpets Jeff! They are awesome…nothing like home made crumpets. Love the texture in the picture! YUM!!

    • 22.1
      Heather
      December 19

      These crumpets ARE indeed WOOT!!! but I sure as hell am not letting Jeff take the credit for them… ha ha ha ;-)

  4. 21
    December 18

    I’ll eat breakfast like a queen as soon as I stop having to go to the work in the morning, thus filling my morning with a hurried pre-work gym session, a frenzied getting-ready session, and then those precious few minutes carved out to eat. Anyone have a winning lottery ticket I can borrow?

    The only crumpets I’ve ever eaten were these tough little mediocre things I used to buy at Trader Joe’s. These look way better.

  5. 20
    December 17

    The crumpets look like the perfect breakfast!

  6. 19
    December 17

    I just came across your blog – these look amazing. I have never made crumpets before. I also love the concept of your blog. If my husband was in the kitchen with me he would drive me batty.

  7. 18
    December 17

    A Crumpet for you. A Crumpet for me. You mean a crumpet for zenchef, i hope. I can be there just in time for breakfast! :)
    I never made crumpets, but that’s gonna change really soon. Those look delicious!

  8. 17
    December 16

    These look great Heather! I would love some right now. I need to get some buttermilk – or better yet, make it (have the cultures in the freezer). This might be good for Christmas morn.

    I am a FIRM believer that breakfast is the most important meal of the day!!

  9. 16
    December 16

    They look like the perfect way to start the day – delish!

  10. 15
    December 16

    I’ll admit I’m the same, I can’t eat anything like a pauper although there’s another saying “you can never be too rich or too thin!” :P

  11. 14
    December 15

    Wow, those are perfect!

  12. 13
    December 15

    Love the new blog!! I haven’t had a crumpet in ages. I’m prob a breakfast and dinner pauper and lunch king, unless of course I’m going out, on vacation, or just got back from a really looooong hike.

  13. 12
    Libraryshade
    December 15

    I haven’t had a crumpet since I could buy them at Waitrose (ie, this summer when I was in London).

    WANT NOW. I wonder if there is good point in this recipe to let the batter-dough sit (overnight, say) before proceeding so I don’t have to get up at 3AM to make these.

  14. 11
    December 15

    oops! sorry..that comment was meant to post on the larb post!

  15. 10
    December 15

    this looks great..always a favorite of ours too..did you try adding roasted rice powder to this?

  16. 9
    December 15

    tea and crumpets… heard the phrase forever, now I know what a crumpet is…

    And where can i get scrooge McDuck PJs???

  17. 8
    December 15

    Oooh, I’ve only made crumpets once, but yeah–they’re freaking amazing! Especially for soaking stuff up–like buttery, runny egg yolks. Damn. Look what you’ve done to me! I want eeegggsss!!!

  18. 7
    December 15

    I want one! Fantastic job!

  19. 6
    December 15

    Ahhhh — tea and crumpets — nothing better. These do look lovely! Perfect coloring!

  20. 5
    December 15

    i can’t remember the last time i had to sift flour! clearly i’m not a baker! these look really good, especially on a morning where I’m feeling lazy but really want to eat a big bfast!

  21. 4
    December 15

    Now that’s the way to make sure you eat breakfast like a king…have it cooked ahead of time!

  22. 3
    December 15

    I do try to have big breakfasts and small dinners, but oh boy, sometimes that’s so difficult. This kind of breakfasts are my favorite, especially during the weekends when I try to shine with my breakfasts. I’ll eat it with ham and jelly or cajeta. Hmmm I need some breakfast now :D

  23. 2
    December 15

    I am with Pam. Eat well for every meal. Just in case.
    Amazing that you made crumpets!! I have never even thought of making them, they are going on my 2010 to-do list.

  24. 1
    December 15

    I too like to eat every meal like a queen, plust a few queenly snacks in between.